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Teenagers

One red crayon pulled out of box above the rest symbolizing perfectionism

Help Your Child Overcome Perfectionism

“I’m not going to basketball practice next week,” Troy announced to his dad just before leaving for school. “The coach is stupid and I don’t like the other guys that much anyway.” “But you’ve been excited to play on the high school team for years and you just made the team!” he replied. “Well I…  Read More

Teenager sleeping at desk on a pile of books at school

The Science Behind Sleeping Teens

Why The Teenage Brain Wants to Stay Up Late and Sleep In

Getting my kids out of bed in the morning when they were teenagers felt like an epic battle of wills. I remember my son Brian begging for just five more minutes of sleep as if his life depended on it. Convinced that his fatigue was caused by going to bed too late, we tried to…  Read More

Child playing with other children in school using soft skills

Why Teaching Soft Skills Requires Patience and Perspective

“Respectful. Caring. Intelligent. Courageous. Hard working. Empathetic. Confident. Humble. Kind.” One of my favorite ways to start a parenting workshop I facilitate on limits and consequences is to ask parents to close their eyes and envision their children-turned-adults. “What kind of people do you hope your kids become?” To be clear, when I ask this…  Read More

Child experiencing digital wellbeing while listening to music and working on laptop

The Three Pillars of Digital Wellbeing

What is digital wellbeing? It is certainly an elusive term, as digital technologies keep changing the way we live and communicate at breathtaking speed. Children and youth today spend more time tethered to technology than any other activity in their waking hours. It is transforming the way that they learn, share, connect and grow. We’ve…  Read More

A teenager trying to do homework amidst digital distractions from laptop and phone

Homework vs. YouTube: Tips for Reducing Distractions

As more and more homework goes online, students are tasked with a daunting task: How do I focus on the assignment and resist the allure of unrelated YouTube videos, social media posts, and other digital distractions? (I emphasize unrelated because some assignments ask students to draw on YouTube and other digital resources for learning). Your…  Read More

Child experiencing gratitude by looking at something through a new lens

The Science of Gratitude in Kids

Why Going From "Gimme" to "Thank You" is Essential to Your Child's Wellbeing

“I’m grateful for Goldy Gopher!” My then three-year-old nephew Ellis exclaimed proudly. “Me too!” His cousin Lucila followed. “Ack!” Shrieked Fiona with an enormous grin, not even one year old. My son Miles responded by dropping some peas on the floor. Welcome to the family tradition we call “Big Circle.” Circling Up My parents have…  Read More

Teenager with pink hair and a nose ring.

How to Support Your Teen’s Identity Development

One summer evening when Monica and I were reading after dinner, our thirteen-year-old son Brian came in the back door. As he walked by the living room, both of our jaws dropped at the sight of his bright orange hair. When I say bright I mean practically neon. Luckily we had the presence of mind…  Read More

Teenager sitting alone at a table looking stressed

Stress and The Brain

Too Much, Too Little, and the Resilience Sweet Spot

As a culture, we are obsessed with stress and the brain –“Stress Free in 40 Days!”– “Go On Vacation and Leave Stress Behind!” say the advertisements. You can buy stress busters, stress exterminators, and stress eradicators. Yet one out of five children report worrying “a great deal” or “a lot.” Millenials (young adults ages 18-33)…  Read More

How To Negotiate With Your Teen

Without Being a Pushover

“Dad, Andy just called and his family is heading out to dinner and he wants to know if I can come. Can I?” My son Brian asked. “That sounds fun but you promised to clean up the basement today.” I responded. “Dad, Andy is leaving for the summer this weekend and this is my chance…  Read More